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Finally went in this morning to find that we have risen to 3, 383! Thank goodness. Viability ultrasound is next week, which should tell us if there is anything wrong or how many peanuts we got in there. Also, there could be a visible heartbeat, but as milestones go…I just want to take each one as it comes and not get too far ahead of ourselves. Crossing fingers and not taking any moment for granted.

So here is what the beta snapshot looks like:

12dp3dt: 169

14dp3dt: 375

19dp3dt: 3,383

The Infamous 2WW: I can honestly say that the whole “two week wait” was an exercise in futility. I never had anything that jumped out at me or screamed anything other than ordinary aches, pains or Endometrin side effects. It was really no different that any other two week wait I had really ever had before. I will say this, I’m glad I never took a home pregnancy test. Chris made me promise not to and I think, in the end, it was for the best since I had already made up my mind that this cycle was a bust anyhow.   So getting the news of our bfp was astounding and truly shocking.  I could barely dial the phone to call Chris I was shaking so hard.  I was so sure it was over for us this go round.  I have never been so happy to be so wrong in my life.


Keeping every single appendage crossed and hoping our ultrasound goes well.

One step at a time…

Todays beta came in at 375. So we are being cautious but optimistic. This falls within a solid doubling time of every 20.9 hours or 0.9 days according to all those goofy beta calculators scattered all over the internet.

We have been scheduled for a third beta next Tuesday morning.

Tentatively very excited with the total and complete understanding that this is super early. Chris likes to say we stepped out of the desert and into the forest…so we will see what will happen next. As of right now, I am continuing my Endometrin 3x a day and resting, resting, resting.

We went in this morning for our blood draw/beta. I, being the pessimist, have been working most of the day at visualizing how I will react to the bad news. What can I focus on that will take my mind off of this four year long struggle reduced down to just one more call for the BFN I am so expecting? How can we move forward successfully? How much time will I give myself to be sad? What will we do next?


We got the call…

Beta: 169


Beta: 169



We go back in on Friday to see if it doubles. I was freaking out asking Nurse what they normally hope to see for a first beta…she said “anything over 25”! Apparently, this is a strong starting number. Oh PLEASE, PLEASE let this continue to rise and continue to stick so we have some healthy babies coming our way!!! I told Chris we need to pick up some pregnancy tests. I need to POAS STAT! I wanna see those lines. I NEED to see those lines.

I have stage IV endometriosis. I have a massive cyst on my left ovary, I have endometriomas up the wazoo. I hope we get rising numbers just to show that you can be riddled with this horrible shit and still be successful. I hope, I hope. Thank you guys so much for your words of encouragement. Thank you for reaching out and just letting me know where you are at and sharing this struggle we all deal with. I honestly am in shock right now.

Crossing fingers for a higher number on Friday.

At work and noticing some cramping this morning.  I am convinced this is totally related to the Endometrin insert I did at 7:30am.  Besides the two day long headache I got on Friday afternoon (7dpt) that lasted until Sunday night (9dpt) I can’t say I have had any symptoms that are significant and have resisted attributing them to anything other than the Endometrin inserts.  Any slight, momentary cramping or small bouts of sore bbs I felt this time, also happened the past two transfer cycles so they are nothing different.  I have had no nausea, no spotting, no pulling in abdomen, no food aversions or smell sensitivity at all.  Naturally, this has left me with the distinct feeling and assertion that this cycle is a busted BFN.

Our beta draw is tomorrow morning and I will have them call husband with the news.

It’s funny what we do to ourselves throughout the 2ww.  One day you google “4dp3dt symptoms” and then “5dpt…6dpt”  until the hope dwindles and you start searching “10dpt NO symptoms“.  You start trolling message boards with thread names like “2ww and no symptoms BFPs“, “How late did you get your +“…just for some hope of that miracle story.  I promised myself I would not do this, yet here I am, at work and googling.  Ugh.  Insanity.


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July 2020


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