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Rock on with that tampon, sister.

It’s funny the little things that happen along this journey that send me into orbit and into panic mode.

Yesterday morning, in the middle of a meeting at work, I felt like I got my period.  Either that or I needed to start wearing depends.  It was maddening not being able to get up right away and find out what was going on downstairs.  This is when my mind starts inventing horrible scenarios:  “it’s my period and my FET will be canceled”, “it’s bleeding that is not supposed to be happening, right? ” or  “I. am. dying.”

I finally managed to get to the bathroom and found out I had gotten my period.  “How can this be?”  I thought.  I had just stopped BCP’s, this I knew, but I was on Lupron.  Wasn’t Lupron supposed to stop this???  I mean, what the hell?

Left message with Dr.’s office.  The Nurse finally called back hours later confirmed to me that this was ok and totally expected.  REALLY?  Totally ok and expected by WHOM?  YOU?  Not me, that’s for sure.  I wasn’t born yesterday…I get it that when you are taking consistent active BCP’s that you will skip your period.  But I could have used a heads up that the Lupron would not have been the band aid overlap to that once I stopped taking them.  Coulda used that information before I spent a good four hours thinking my ass was on the line for another delay in this already deferred process we are  going through.

Ugh, I am such a sensitive person about this.  Like anything that seems out of the ordinary sets me off into negative territory. Have to get better at dealing with this kind of stuff.

Still, it would have been helpful for them to clue me into this from the get go.

Physically:  Let’s talk about migraines for a moment, shall we?  They come on with Lupron.  They come and they rule.  They rule like weeds in a garden.  The other day at work, I had to go into the ladies bathroom, shut off the lights and lay on the tile just to get my head to a bearable stage.  It happens every single time I am on it and nothing helps.  Le sigh.

Mentally: The usual.  Good days and bad days.  Some days it’s happy time, sunshine and punch lines.  Others its rainy days, decay and malaise.  It is what it is and I take it day by day.


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July 2009


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